Pi Attitude Zone: Flexibility

Enough Already With Internet Bafflegab

Last week a Pi blogpost railed against the incomprehensible gibberish issued by corporations instead of talking in plain English;  [Corpspeak? Hell, No]. 

Here’s another example: “An opportunity was identified to make [Company X] part of the authority-mandated solution for the increasing obesity issue in the country. By directly contributing to the introduction of new ethical norms, [Company X] has reaffirmed its commitment to the health of its consumers and to the development of responsible citizens and conscientious consumers”.

Translation: “To avoid nasty legislation, we’re voluntarily telling people our food products contain a lot of sugar and they should eat them sparingly to avoid getting obese”.

The Washington Post has pointed its accusing finger at a growing blizzard of bafflegab on the internet.  “Terms such as ‘optimize’, ‘prioritize’, ‘initiative’, parameter’, ‘implement’ and ‘effectuate’ have become common parlance on the Web”, the paper complains.  They even counted over 2,000 instances of the eerily meaningless phrase “implementation of prioritized initiatives”.

The most horrifying case was a New Jersey businessman whose website claims that he helps his clients to “assess, optimize, prioritize and implement strategic initiatives” in the context of the “conceptual design of enterprise models”.  Careful detective work unearthed clues that what the gentleman actually did was something to do with IT.  This suggests that “information technology” can occasionally be an oxymoron.  As to people who talk that way, well, let’s just drop the “oxy-“.

All together now: Bafflegab and Corpspeak?  Hell, no!

Zone: Flexibility Country: Multiple Geographies Product – Business / Professional